


A [Not] Love Story

by LoveIsAMyth (sweetponzu)



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: M/M, Unrequited Love, aren't they kinda sketch???, movie theaters
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-24
Updated: 2015-12-12
Packaged: 2018-05-03 04:20:04
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,105
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5276372
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sweetponzu/pseuds/LoveIsAMyth
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>People always say that romantic movies and love stories were too over the top and filled with wonky coincidences that they couldn't possibly apply to real life.</p><p>And they're right.</p><p>Jihoon's life isn't a love story and if it was, then he wasn't it's protagonist-- Doyoon was. Because it's Doyoon who had Seungcheol's arms around him, the one who gets to wake up to his smiles and sad looking pancakes, the one who gets to cheesily shout out his love with Seungcheol in the middle of Namsan bridge, the one who is The One for Seungcheol-- and Jihoon can list all the stereotypical, disgustingly sweet things that they could be doing as they drowned in their cloying love but unfortunately he'd just retched on one of the cleaning staff at the theater and it's getting a bit hard to breathe through the puke clogging his throat.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prequel

**Author's Note:**

> I honestly hate myself for writing this. The premise is so cliche and I don't even know how to write Doyoon properly like ???? But it wrote itself so, mansae for more Seventeen!!!!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When you believe that quote about being the protagonist of your life. Ha!

He thought it odd that he was first to die. The character, now bleeding out and alone on the cold forest's floor, seemed like the main character. They had followed his thoughts and actions since the beginning of the movie. It didn't make sense that he didn't survive longer. 

 

Now the flow of the story feels wrong. Messed up, somehow. The dead character faded from the narrative as smoothly as water coursing through the rivers that the rest of the survivors are crossing. 

 

It's a weird movie and the only reason he's sitting through it and actually paid attention was because Seungcheol was on a date with Doyoon and they were sitting a couple seats to his left. He didn't think they knew he was there, since they had come in late, but if he stands to leave, they'd surely notice. And he didn't want that. They were the last two people he wanted to see at the moment. 

 

Jihoon loves Seungcheol. He knew this ever since the older boy believed in him, when no one else would. He had stood up for Jihoon and his dreams. Seungcheol was Jihoon's hero.

 

Unfortunately, this occurred during the precarious time of puberty. And one day he'd just woken up to soiled boxers after a hazy dream filled with Seungcheol's voice, which he'd never even heard sound that way, and his hands doing things that made him cry out. 

 

He'd made things awkward, of course. He'd attempted to avoid Seunghcheol at all moments possible. There was no escape in his dreams though. And after a couple days, there wasn't any in the real world either. 

 

"I don't know what's wrong," He'd clutched Jihoon's wrist, stopping him from turning away, "but If you don't tell me, then I can't say sorry." He had kept his head down, his eyes shielded from view. Jihoon couldn't say If he had just imagined the tremor in his voice.

 

There had been a couple beats of silence that Jihoon didn't know how to fill. So all he did was stare at his captured wrist and Seungcheol's almost painful tightening grip on it.

 

Seungcheol looked up, guessing that Jihoon wasn't going to say anything and continued; "And I'm not about to let anything get in the way of our friendship, not me and not even you." 

 

It felt as if Seungcheol had his grip on Jihoon's heart instead of his wrist, at that moment.

 

Now, years later, the bruise had faded from his skin but Seungcheol's hands still have a hold of his heart. 

 

Jihoon had never dated anyone-- there was simply no vacancy left within his heart. It had been filled upto bursting with all things Seungcheol. The things he did to make Jihoon smile, the things he did that Jihoon hated, his moments of sadness and vulnerability... every little thing he knew of Seungcheol, he'd stole away inside himself, like a thief hoarding precious jewels.

 

Seungcheol wasn't exactly the same way...he's had one night stands. But aside from his first girlfriend back in middle school, he'd never really dated. 

 

He'd told Jihoon with a thoughtful frown that "She didn't like that I made time to hang out with you-- so she had to go." 

 

"You and me, we're a package deal, ya know?" He hooked his arm around Jihoon's neck, giving him a sly kiss to his head, something he knew Jihoon hated but secretly liked, before dragging him off to the arcade.

 

His words had filled Jihoon to the brim with hope and love-- they had made him feel light. Those same emotions from back then are still present but now they only serve to keep Jihoon tied to Seuncheol, while Seungcheol roamed free, dragging Jihoon's battered heart through more roads paved with glass shards and cracked asphalt.

 

He'd endured the pain, thinking that it will all be worth it. That Seungcheol will realize that Jihoon was the only one for him too. That they would eventually find their way into each other's arms.

 

But Jihoon's a fool. Because this wasn't a love story and he wasn't the main character. He was the guy who made the end of the movie possible by giving way to the true protagonists by dying alone in a haunted forest. 

 

Jihoon's whole story only served as back story for Seungcheol getting together with Doyoon. 

 

And how fucked up was that? Very.

 

The popcorn isn't settling well in his stomach well and he feels like puking but even breathing makes him feel like he's attracting too much attention to himself, so he sits tight.

 

He sits there in the musty, old theater seats long enough that everyone's gone and the cleaning crew starts to come in. One of them approaches him, probably to ask him to leave, but the sound of him retching out all the empty calories of popped corn and soda made it a bit hard to hear. 

 


	2. Lucky Soonyoung's Romantic(?) Comedy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You puke on someone and by the end of the night you're making out with them? Who writes these Romantic-Comedies, seriously?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am trash.

 

"So. Wanna talk about it?"

 

If Jihoon didn't just blew chunks on the guy, he may have just punched him.

 

He manages a small garbled  _No_. He gets awarded the sickening taste of puke sliding down his throat for his efforts.

 

"Hmm. Okay." 

 

Jihoon feels something cool pressed against his cheek. It was a water bottle.

 

"I'll talk about it, instead~"

 

Jihoon would thank him, but he doesn't want to risk tasting his own putrid upchuck again. Also, this guy is a little weird?

 

"I think that the ending was good for the protagonist." Jihoon takes the time to raise an eyebrow at that as he gargled water around his mouth. The cleaner didn't seem to mind and continued over the noise.

 

"Everyone else died, having known what was going on and being awful to each other, anyway. At least the protagonist died thinking that he did the right thing."

 

But did that even count? What did it matter what the fake 'protagonist' thought? He died the first 30 minutes into the movie. Jihoon can't believe how much of a romantic this guy was, for someone working a shit job at a musty old theater.

 

The words tumble out, as if pulled from his lips.

 

"But he didn't. His death was going to happen one way or another-- they were all meant to die." He tried to hide how bitter he was feeling but he didn't think he succeeded.

 

"He was just a fool who gave his life away to other dead men." He hadn't meant to say  _fool_  so sharply but he really was. A fool, that is.

 

And Jihoon was just like him. 

 

"Hmmm, maybe you're right." A surprising response, since this guy seemed a little too into his own take of a fictional character's death.

 

He goes to rake through his blonde frizzled hair but aborts the action once he remembers that there are puke remains on it. Jihoon feels a little bad for the guy.

 

"But that wasn't how he saw it, ya know? The end of the movie for him, was the moment he'd breathed his last-- anything else that happened afterwards was irrelevant." 

 

Jihoon is stunned for a moment. Then, he gets angry. It isn't supposed to be as simple as he is making it out to be!

 

"That...that is not how things work! People just can't be self-satisfied like that!"

 

He's still heaving from what he's shouted in a fit of indignation, so his breath gets knocked out him when the other grabs a hold of his shoulders and just  _shakes_.

 

"But why can't they?! Why can't people just do their best and come away, win or lose, satisfied with their efforts and  _move on_?"

 

And tears are prickling his eyes, making his vision blurry. He wants to blame it on how difficult it felt to breathe but it wasn't. Because this stranger was shaking him, trying to make him think about things that he didn't want to. Because no one from his group of friends knew about how he's been hurting. Because he's felt like shit the whole week. 

 

Because Seungcheol will never love him back.

 

"B-because it hurts... because I've loved him for so long that i'd forgotten how to do anything else  _but_  that!"

 

He's a mess of dried puke and fresh tears but arms circle around him to hold him together. He cries and heaves as the theater worker rakes his hand through his hair, massaging them into his head. It takes an eternity for Jihoon's crying to subside into little sobs and a moment more for the silence to be broken.

 

The other says, in a soft, comforting whisper that sounded sweet to Jihoon's ears; 

 

"So, wanna talk about it over Soju?"

 

Jihoon punches him, this time. But he also says yes.

 

...

 

"You know, for a little guy, your punches sure are strong."

 

Jihoon may have cried out his whole pathetic one-sided love to the guy, but he wasn't about to let him call him short.

 

Jihoon opens his mouth to protest but Soonyoung, the weird worker from the theater, takes that opportunity to stuff him with spicy rice cakes. 

 

He has to take three gulps of water before the searing spiciness mellows out enough so that he can fire a retort back to Soonyoung. The bastard just looked at him with an amused smile the entire time. 

 

"Have you ever considered that maybe you're just weak? And I. am. not. little!"

 

The bastard only laughs at him. 

 

"It's really cute that you can't handle spicy foods, Jihoonie. Don't worry, hyung will eat all the evil spicy foods for you~"

 

He reaches out to pinch Jihoon's cheeks but Jihoon was not having any of that. He slaps Soonyoung's offending hand away from his person before pointing his chopstick at him with a pointed look.

 

"Yah, don't call me that! And I am older than I look, what If I was the hyung instead?"

 

Their order of Soondae  arrives so Jihoon is caught off-guard when Soonyoung ruffles his hair while cooing at him.

 

"Aww, of course I'm the hyung, I already saw your ID when you went to pay for the ticket, remember?"

 

Smoothly, Soonyoung does not address his term of endearment for the other boy.

 

"What the hell? How can you even remember that? I didn't even remember you. " 

 

"Hyung is hurt Jihoonie, how cruel." Soonyoung pouts before he turns it into a mischievous smile.

 

"For me, it was preeetty hard not take note of someone with pink hair who looked like an elementary school student buying a ticket for a PG 18 movie." 

 

He gets a punch in the shoulder for that and a secondary one for looking so damn satisfied with himself.

 

"Speaking of your job, shouldn't you have gone back to work ages ago?" Jihoon asks, while playing with an empty stick of barbecue.

 

"Haha, they actually let me off for the night because you puked on me. Guess I was lucky, huh?"  Soonyoung flashes a wide close-eyed smile at him. It was a little dazzling but he blames that on the lighting of the stall.

 

"Yeah, if you liked smelling like upchuck and spending your evening drinking Soju with strangers." Jihoon takes another swig of Soju, satisfied that his response was biting enough.

 

"I don't see any strangers though? All i see is a pink haired fairy in front of me." Soonyoung says, with a serious voice, letting out a soft, secret smile. 

 

At this point, they've drunk about five bottles of Soju between them and Soonyoung has probably grown a sizable bruise on his arm because Jihoon's more loose with his fists and emotions when drunk.

 

Jihoon looks down and mumbles a small _I wish Seungcheol saw what you see_.

 

Soonyoung pretends not to hear and comes closer to Jihoon, asking him to repeat what he said.

 

"I said: What pink haired fairy? T-that's bullshit." Jihoon tried to glare but the tears make it hard to focus on Soonyoung's face and he hates that his voice cracked and that maybe he's ruined the night and-- Soonyoung's pulling at his arm. Leading him away from the stall, after leaving money on the table. They stop at an alley, where up-turned garbage cans reveal their messy insides and the flies swirling around them gleefully.

 

The air outside is cold and it bites into his skin but he's warmed, almost to the point of burning, when he feels lips against his.

 

...

 

Kissing Jihoon is a bit like making out with garbage. The smell is awful and Jihoon's mouth is rigid, frozen and closed. He pulls the smaller boy into his arms and he gets a gasp of surprise in response. He takes the opening and melds his tongue with Jihoon's. 

 

He can tell that the other boy had no experience but it was cute how he'd slipped his arms around Soonyoung's neck to pull him closer. He lifts the other onto him, grabbing a hold of Jihoon's thighs as he wraps his legs around Soonyoung's waist. He pushes Jihoon back against the wall because ge doesn't think he can support his weight on his own, plus he wanted to hear another wet gasp from Jihoon. He succeeds.

 

After a while, he has to pull away to breathe. But Jihoon lets out a neglected whine that has him diving back into his lips. Soonyoung didn't need air, he just needed Jihoon's lips. 

 

Soon, they're both hot and panting into each others mouths. He's half-hard and Jihoon keeps squirming to close the non-existent space between them. He groans when Jihoon brushes his own bulge against his-- the rough pressure of jeans rubbing unto him made him hiss out and break free from their lip lock. 

 

Things were going too fast and they needed to get to a bed.

 

Luckily, Soonyoung lived nearby.


	3. Predators and Choir Boys

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jihoon's due for a hair cut.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SO, good news-- I've found my Jeonghan [meaning I've found how I want to write him now]  
> [maybe] bad news, I can't have him be a stand in character-- not when I've found how much of a glorious plot device his friendship with the characters can be, so Seungcheol's love interest has now been promptly changed to Doyoon [ whom I have absolutely no idea how to write], Enjoy!

It was official; Lee Jihoon was an easy whore who lost his virginity to the first guy who'd given him a kiss. His first kiss. In an alleyway that stunk of garbage while covered in his own nauseating puke. It was pathetic and sad.

 

"I'm pathetic."

 

Jeonghan graces him with a raised eye brow and then goes back to reading his magazine, disinterested. 

 

Jihoon sighs, "I'm pathetic." A little louder this time. 

 

He hears clattering in the kitchen and some snickers but doesn't get any response otherwise.

 

Jeonghan rolls his eyes before nudging Seungkwan who was glued to his phone, typing something quickly, "Hold on, I'm about to finish the story." Jihoon makes a noise that sounded like keeling but may have been the growl of a chihuahua. Jeonghan, evidently done with them, hits Seungkwan in the back of the head with his magazine before deftly dodging the ricochet of the pillow Jihoon threw at Seungkwan's head shortly after. Seungkwan yelps but still continues typing.

 

"YAH. I would really appreciate it if you held off on telling all eight of your total followers," He continues, nonplussed at Seungkwan's protesting 'Hey!', "about how pathetic I am. I don't need anymore confirmation of that."

 

"Aish, Jihoon-hyung, you're not pathetic," Seungkwan rubs the back of his head, giving Jihoon a comforting smile, a twinkle in his eyes. "You're just really,  _really_  easy." 

 

Jihoon almost believed that Seungkwan was finally going to be a good friend. The thought lasted for all of one second, however. Seungkwan gets awarded with a pillow to his face. Mingyu comes in with a huge pot of his specialty ramen. The lid did little to cover up the nauseating smell of things that are bad for you but taste so good that you dont care.

 

Seungcheol and Mingyu's ramen creations had that much in common.

 

"Hyung, you shouldn't take out your anger on Seungkwan-- he can't help being annoying." Seungkwan shoots the taller boy a nasty look but doesn't throw anything. Mingyu only smirked, knowing he was untouchable when he had food in his arms.

 

"Uhh, I'm actually sharing your story to tell the world of the injustice you've been put through. You were piss drunk," 

 

"So was the other guy," Jeonghan throws, opening a ramen packet and eating the uncooked noodles.

 

"And doesn't that totally mean that he took advantage of you?" Completely ignoring what Jeonghan said, Seungkwan ends with what he may have considered a controversial whisper.

 

It didn't really occur to Jihoon but he wasn't the one to propose drinking-- it was Soonyoung. He wasn't the one who initiated the kiss either. He feels even worse now, the idea of having been taken advantage of weighed heavy within him. He opens his mouth but no sound comes out. Though his face conveys enough how he felt oddly betrayed.

 

"I don't think you can blame the guy hyung-- I mean, if we weren't friends, meaning I was unaware of your evil ways, and I kissed you. And you jumped me? I'd totally let it happen. You're like perfect twink material.“ Trust Mingyu to know just the right things to say.

 

"Actually, didn't Jihoon-hyung do the fucking? Since his asshole isn't sore or anything."

           

"Thank you, predatory homo and gay choir boy-- I think you've done enough damage." Jeonghan cards his hand through Jihoon's hair, attempting to relax the other boy, even though all it does is make Jihoon worried that Jeonghan finds his hair's greasy condition disgusting. "Jisoo's coming soon. Nobody say a word till he gets here."

 

It was easy enough for the others. Mingyu goes back to the kitchen to mix weird drinks as a punishment game later, Jeonghan returns to reading his magazine and Seungkwan resumes his incessant typing. 

 

Jihoon's left to his own thoughts. Was he taken advantage of? He doesn't even know how he's supposed to react. He just knows that he won't ever dare to go back to the theaters for a while. He wouldn't know how to face Soonyoung.

 

The door bell rings and everyone lets out a collective sigh of relief. Jisoo is Jihoon's only friend who's familiar with the concept of comforting others. Consequently, the others all acknowledge that Jisoo is the best at calming Jihoon down, aside from Seungcheol. Nowadays, Jihoon becomes scarce should Seungcheol be around, so Jisoo is the only real option right now.

 

Jeonghan gets the door but it's not Jisoo's gentle smile he sees. It was Seungcheol. God, he hadn't even thought about how Seungcheol was going to react once he-- if he finds out. Jihoon's flinch doesn't go unnoticed as a couple eyes quickly glance at him, and then back at Seungcheol.

 

Seungcheol sits himself down on the beat up couch he, Jeonghan and Mingyu had hauled up from some side street where it had been abandoned.

 

"Hey guys, whats up?" 

 

"I thought you were going on a date with Doyoon today?" Jeonghan side eyes Jihoon, looking to see how the other will bolt.

 

"Ah, about that," Seungcheol smiles, sheepish, "is it fine if he comes over for game night? The amusement park closed last minute because of the forecast."

 

"Where are you going hyung?" Mingyu asks Jihoon, arms filled with different flavored Fanta. 

 

"I just remembered," He stuffs his lyrics notebook into his bag, "I have an essay due for Composition Theory." He's halfway past the couch before he's stopped by Seungcheol's grip on his wrist. 

 

"It's Saturday, what kind of professor makes their papaers due on a weekend?" Seungkwan asks, edging out Seungcheol, while scrunching his face in disgust.

 

"An asshole one," He wrenches Seungcheol's grip from him, "just like you." 

 

Seungkwan's jaw drops, an offended sound escaping from his throat, and Seungcheol shoots him a look--like it was his fault!-- before running to catch up to the smaller boy. 

 

Jihoon walks till he's running. The wind is whipping his hair against his face and it’s annoying but he can't be bothered. He pays for that by tripping on the elevated step of the Central Quad. There’s a harsh stinging on his knee and the side of his left arm felt raw but all feeling seeps out when he feels Seungcheol pull him up from where he'd fallen. 

 

He wished Seungcheol wasn't such a good friend. If he wasn't one, this would have ever needed to happen. He wouldn't love him, wouldn't have his heart broken and wouldn't have had sex with a stranger while piss drunk. It was all Seungcheol's fault. And Jihoon couldn't even bring himself to hate him? It's just so hard and he feels like being torn apart at all sides would bring him less pain. It's so pathetic and the fact that he's feeling tears prickle at the corners of his eyes only serves to make him angrier, producing more tears. He hated crying, it never solved anything.

 

Seungcheol's not sure why Jihoon was crying or why the other has been distant lately, but he knows that Jihoon, who can make amazing music and thoughtful lyrics, can just as easily lose himself in his own problems, not realizing that he had others to lean on. It's Seungcheol's duty to remind Jihoon that he will always have him, just as he knows that Jihoon will always be there for him. He wipes Jihoon's tears, fitting the other boy's head into the crook of his neck while rubbing circles into his tense shoulder. 

 

For a while, they stand there as a few others pass by, not minding them. In college, everyone was very self contained, content in their niche of friends and are more than happy to let anything they see that’s odd slide. It was college, after all.

 

"We should go back inside, it'll start raining heavily soon." Jihoon, who cannot find his voice, merely shook his head. He tries not to bury his head into Seungcheol's warmth but he's weak. His will's weaker still, when it came to Seungcheol.

 

"I'm sure 'Kwannie didn't mean to make you angry, he's probably going to apologize once we come back."  The  _I'll make him_  goes unsaid.

 

Jihoon pushes his way out of the embrace, shaking his head vigorously. There was no way he can survive staying for game night. Doyoon was going to be there. With Seungcheol. That was already bad enough but he didn't need to be there when they find out about where Jihoon had been during their last date night.

 

"I don't understand what’s wrong but I won't know if you won't tell me, Jihoon!" Seungcheol grabs a hold of his arm and Jihoon winces because he's pretty sure that he scraped it from his fall. Seungcheol quickly turns worried, coming closer to look at his arm. Jihoon feels like his heart is trying to beat its way out through his throat, every second that passed made it harder to breathe in and out. It tastes cotton at the back of his throat and the dull throbbing pain on his knee and arm made it hard to focus. He's pulled out of his oncoming panic attack by a familiar voice which reminded him of cheap soju and the putrid smell of puke.

 

"Hey, can you let go of my boyfriend? He doesn't like it when others touch him." 

 

...

 

Although Jihoon has been distant lately, Seungcheol knows not to believe this stranger claiming to be Jihoon's boyfriend. 

 

"I'm sorry," Seungcheol says, sounding distinctly unapologetic, "who are you?"

 

"My name is Soonyoung and I would really appreciate it if you would let go of Jihoonie."  He's smiling widely but his eyes were looking pointedly on his hand around Jihoon's arms. He would tighten his grip, just to spite this unknown person, but he has enough presence of mind to remember that Jihoon may be hurt. He loosens his hold and leans down to look directly into Jihoon's eyes. "Jihoon, do you know who this guy is?" 

 

He nods, hesitantly, not looking into Seungcheol's eyes. Jihoon clears his throat, eyes blinking a mile a minute while tugging down at his sleeves continuously. "I need to talk to him, so can you go ahead? I'll come back, once we're done talking..." 

 

Jihoon is lying and Seungcheol knows. Jihoon knows that Seungcheol knows but he was still doing it anyway. Why would Jihoon choose to go with this guy who he seems completely nervous about, instead of just going back with him?

 

"But your arm is--" 

 

"The nursing majors in my dorm can make quick work of that for you, Jihoonie~!" 'Soonyoung' says while approaching Jihoon's side and placing his hand at the small of the injured boy's back.

 

The whole exchange was completely dubious and he was about to argue but his phone rang-- it was Doyoon. By the time the phone call ends and he's promised Doyoon that he was coming soon; the two were already gone.


End file.
